An Emptiness – Friday Fictioneers

Friday fictioneers
Photo credit @Madison Woods

An Emptiness

Max lie awake, restless, the campfire crackling, sending sparks towards the clouded moon. He wondered about the new kid’s story, “Idiot, nearly got his self killed falling off a west bound.”

Max gathered stories and every hobo had one, it always came down to gnawing hunger. Truth be told, an empty belly wasn’t the only hunger that put a drifter on the rails but it sure enough would stick with ya.

“A man gets starved for permanence: a warm bed, a soft woman, a kid, anything that he can call his own; leaves ya with an emptiness that no amount of grub can fill.”

For more Friday Fictioneers visit @Rochelle Wiseoff-Fields here.

43 Comments Add yours

  1. ansumani says:

    Tracey, Tell us the truth! you were a Hobo once weren’t you? How else can you potray with such precision what goes on in those hearts…

    Like

    1. ansumani says:

      edit: portray . I need spell-check in comments too πŸ™‚

      Like

      1. Yes, it’s true. I am an American hobo. I blog with the free wi-fi at Hobe Cafe.
        πŸ™‚

        Liked by 2 people

      2. ansumani says:

        Sounds like a fun place πŸ™‚

        Like

  2. I like the idea of Max collecting stories. Bet he got some good ones.

    Like

    1. Alicia,
      Max has lots of stories because he is The Storyman.
      Tracey

      Liked by 1 person

  3. blondeusk says:

    Nice work Tracey!

    Like

    1. Thank you, I so appreciate my British Blogger pals.
      Tracey

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Miles Rost says:

    A darker side of the idea of Hobos. The lighter side being Leo Sayer’s “Long Tall Glasses (I Can Dance)”.

    Nice!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sure Max can dance too.

      Like

  5. gahlearner says:

    I’m glad to read about Max again. The hunger for a normal life is showing that emptiness clearly. Great story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t know yet if Max will get a normal life.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. draliman says:

    Very realistic-sounding story of hobos’ lives and wishes. Nice story!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Ali, I’m glad you liked it.

      Like

  7. mjlstories says:

    Starved for permanence – a great image/concept. Lovely language all round.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I don’t know if Max will find any permanence he hasn’t told me his ultimate plan.

      Like

  8. Sandra says:

    I see what you mean by your comment on mine Tracey. πŸ™‚ Good one, the voice was very convincing.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Great story Tracey! I loved it. It took me back to my childhood when “hobos” were prominent and of the stories I would hear about them. Very nostalgic!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Joy. I’ll make sure to share when I write more about Max!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. rgayer55 says:

    My dad used to tell hobo stories. I think he had some family members who spent time riding the rails. It was quite common in the 20s & 30s. Your story put me right there.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, My parents told many stories from the Depression Era.

      Like

  11. Amy Reese says:

    I like the idea of them all telling stories around the campfire with the full moon and can see him staring up at it pondering it all. That is a terrible kind of emptiness. Well said and well told story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My life is full and I’m grateful for that.
      Thanks Amy

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Wow, the voice in this piece is pitch-perfect! Excellent job. You really captured the hobo life and mood.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Portlandian Batgirl. πŸ˜‰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Haha! You are quite welcome. Should you need a slinky crime-fighter, I’m your gal (but only in my zany imagination)!

        Like

  13. I would imagine there are a great many stories hobo’s could tell.
    This reminds me of when I was a girl scout leader and we had backyard camping. The girls would make up stories that were entertaining and sometimes scary. Very enjoyable read, Tracey. Nicely done !!! 😎

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love the idea of encouraging kids to make up stories. Time well spent.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Their imaginations were full of creative thoughts. My daughters range in age from 39 to 48. They still remember those times. I wish parents would do more of that today. 😎

        Like

  14. Timeless truth here. Loved the wistful tone.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, wistful. That’s a great description. Thank you.

      Like

  15. Dear Tracey,

    You had me in the moment with Max. Great voice and descriptions. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Margaret says:

    A moving portrayal of the deeper hunger the homeless must feel. It’s such a shame that in our modern, affluent society, we still have homelessness.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. You captured the scene beautifully. I hope Max gets chance to make some new stories πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Max has lots of stories and he’s been whispering them in my ear. Thank you Cheryl.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. BobiJo says:

    How clearly you remind us of all our hungers! And along with wanting something or someone to call our own – we hunger to feel we belong, and are empty when we have no sense of belonging.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Ira PT says:

    Life is about collecting stories… some sad, others happy. Wonderful take!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. So many types of hunger, well said. Great story, Tracey!

    Liked by 1 person

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